Accepting is hard...

Accepting that you cannot make everything right in the world let alone your life is tough to swallow. I'm trying not to choke.

Shot a submission for Papercut magazine last Friday. Got everything shot, retouched and submitted the same day before midnight. Usually do not wait till the last minute on this kind of stuff but factors dictated otherwise.

The theme was to base the shoot on a movie scene so I chose Dracula. Had to use only unknown designers clothes or accessories. We showcased an up & coming jewelry designer who also models named Renee Prows. The models I used in the shoot were Renee Prows, Abby White, Lisa Marie Miller, and Amber Everett.

I also shot some top secret dresses from designer Amy Kirchen that will be debuted at NYC Fashion Week in September 2011. I can't wait to show the pics!!! Used models Amber Everett and Lisa Marie Miller for the designs. Shot outside in 105 degrees and somehow the models remained un-melted!!! The designer is in LOVE with one of the pics and just loves the rest!! Leigha Huff did hair and Carly Pundt did makeup on both shoots.

I find out today if Papercut uses any of my submission.

Yesterday I was videoing acting reels for some of the model/actors that I shoot with. They had went to Dallas to "EXPO" and had some interest from VH-1 and agents.

What does it all mean...

Sitting here eating food at a restaurant and doing some computer work. People behind me are talking loudly about the one girls dad having cancer. Just made me think about how short life is and about my mom and brother who died of cancer. I am a mix of emotions at the moment..thoughts flooding. Makes me sad...been missing my mom alot lately. Had a dream about her and all she did was hug me..I cried and just told her I was so tired. I felt better.

I applied to be a still photographer on the AVENGERS movie that's filming in August. Anyone that is into superheroes knows this movie will be huge...hoping I get to be a part of it. Robert Downey Jr. that plays Tony Stark/IRON MAN has been on my dream list to photograph.

Shot for a small MAXIM/PLAYBOY type magazine about a month ago. Got the cover. (see above)

Also have some of my fashion work in a modeling industry magazine magazine. Models were Amy Hixson of Vision (los Angeles) and Marilyn (NYC) and Miles Miller of MTM and can't think of his other agency.

I have to go, having a meeting with another photographer.

When it rains..

Lately when it rains I feel a calmness come over me. I close my eyes and I breathe. It's raining right now as I sit in a Tim Horton's. A steady rain that I much needed in my day. I feel a bit exhausted lately both mentally and physically.

As you may have noticed the space between my last post and this one. Well, I've been busy shooting a lot and as I mentioned, very exhausted.

My shoots have been great though. Models have really been stepping up to the model plate and helping me create some magic. I mean really solid stuff..I will be posting stuff soon to my site and Facebook.

I just realized that the rain has played a part in almost every shoot I've done since the beginning of May. It has rained almost every shoot except for one..yes I shoot in the rain. The colors are so enhanced and the mood...hmmmm. Sorry, just thinking about my last shoot. Looked like a rainforest vibe and was shooting bikini stuff.

I am in thought...I am in a nyc state of mind...I need to go back there soon.

Speaking of NYC, just had one of my models I love to shoot sign with BMG in NYC. Very proud of her as I am all that I work with.

Almost forgot, I had one of my photos approved for the VOGUE Italia website. It was this photo of Amber that I posted above. Very proud of her as well...she has been my muse and friend.

I've also been shooting more video and when I get some time you will be seeing one featuring Amber.

OK, I'm getting tired and I need to head home early for once and rest.

One last note, my sister is fine. There luckily was no blockage..whatever they thought was there was nothing.

Video: I think I likeeeeee

Just put together a "video movie" of some models I photographed. This project came from boredom and creativity...been kicking the idea around after seeing vids from modeling agencies/photogs. Finally decided to try my hand at editing, etc. The results can be seen to your right in the youtube section. Let me know what you think.

All that and a bag of...

Today has been a typical day of running errands and being mentally numb. I just finished answering emails which is what I'm basing this post on.

I open this email that has about twenty photos attached (including a shot of the models baby) which is great. The text in the email talks about wanting to work with me, etc. Very nice but not very clear what she really wants from me. I email back asking her if she is wanting to hire me and my team. She replies that she basically wants free pics...hello!!!! Unless you are a Kate Moss, Candice Swanepoel or Amber Everett...I has to gets paid!!!

I replied politely that as much as I'd love to photograph people for free that this was my business. I have to make money to live as do the people that are on my team.

Sometimes I wonder if people realize that I have to pay bills too lol.

Anyway, just found out my oldest sister is in the hospital with blockage in the front of her heart. May be making a trip to Ky depending..holding good thoughts and prayers for her.

I'm feeling sick today...

Sunday I had a shoot outdoors all day. It had been raining and kind of cool. Was outside for about 9 hours mainly on the ground.

Shot with 6 models preparing them for an expo in Dallas. Got some good stuff so they should be set.

As soon as it was over and I was driving away, the rain came again. Went for chinese food after but couldn't eat it all..barely ate any.

Monday was an agency shoot and I spent some time again outside. This time it was raining and I was wet. Today I think it's caught up with me. Just feel sick to my stomach and very tired. I just wanna roll up in a ball and sleep...now I just started sneezing.

Today has been the usual with me leaving the house about 9 am and running errands. Nothing to eventful today..just trying to book shoots and pay bills.

I miss NYC so bad. I need to go there soon..random thought as I sit in a Wendy's dining area finishing my lunch.

Started working on some portaiture stuff the other day. I shoot fashion mainly but am wanting to get into celebrity portraits eventually...if I can figure how to post some I will.

Model... where art thou????

I've decided to start a blog. Does anyone blog anymore??

Today I had two photoshoots scheduled. The first with the beautiful Ashley S. Three commercial looks to update her portfolio for Dallas. Trish the Dish was on makeup duty..got Ash ready and we had to postpone the shoot. Her poor mom was so sick, doubled up in the car..eventually had to be taken to the emergency room. I'm hoping she is ok...bless her for trying to be a good mom to get her daughters shoot done.

The second shoot was a bust. The model was a no call no show. Tried calling and texting her several times but nothing. Ended up waiting and waisting my and the makeup artists time. Made me realize upon the suggestion of my awesome and sexy assistant that I should have a non refundable policy on deposits.

On a positive note, I shot some wonderful photos of Trish and some others from the agency I shoot for. Black and white..mix of fashion, commercial and just basically some portraits.

I've been in a creative mood this past week. Well, really a different creative mood than usual. I've been more in tune with somberness and peace. I'll admit I've been melancholy lately. Things are out of whack at the moment but it seems to be fueling something inside my creative heart.